One of the most beneficial lessons in life management is to harness the power of our self-talk. As I look back at my own life, it's easy to see how my self-talk kept me caught up in the criminal justice system for most of the first 38 years of my life. My thoughts were not focused on change and I spent most of my mental energy on figuring out ways to get better at being a thief!
The impact of my self-talk was not something that was even a part of my conscious awareness. How many of us spend time thinking about what we think about? We might caution our children about thinking negative thoughts, but usually it's just a passing comment. Yet when we become aware of the influence our self-talk has on our lives, it's like a revelation! When I first encountered Lou Tice and became aware of how powerful this concept is, it changed my life. Looking back, it seems so simple, yet so few of us consider how we talk to ourselves.
There is a constant stream of self-talk that is continuously running through our minds. To the degree that the self-talk is negative or devaluing, it lowers our opinion of ourselves and takes much of the joy out of life. The self-talk that runs through a group can lower their expectations. It can be tiring to be around negative people who are always bad mouthing others and tearing down their self-esteem.
Unfortunately, in difficult times, it is easy to get caught up in a downward spiral of negative self-talk. Current reality can be challenging at times, but most of us have gotten through tough situations before. Keeping a positive outlook doesn't mean that you're weak or blind to current reality. However, that energy can be used to stimulate your creativity and allow you to stay motivated.
Change is a part of our world. It can be experienced as a problem that we have no control over, or it can be looked at as an opportunity to open up new markets and create new products and services. The self-talk that goes on in an office or a plant has direct impact on the culture that we work in.
Life isn't always easy. We hit rough spots now and then, and at those times, staying focused on what you want and controlling your self-talk can be a great help. Our mental feedback can paint a picture of what we want or what we don't want. It's a choice. We don't intentionally go around making mistakes, so there's really little value in painting a picture of the mistake. We move toward what we think about. We need to change the picture we paint if it's one we don't like or want in our lives.
A phrase that became a part of my self-talk following a mistake was, "That's not like me. Next time I intend to..." Then you paint a mental picture of what you want. When assisting others, the same techniques work: "That's not like you. I see you as...," and you paint them into a new picture. Gradually, this becomes a part of your new vocabulary. Being positive is not being soft; it creates high expectations in yourself and in others.
Becoming conscious of our self-talk can be a huge leap in awareness and awareness is the first step to change. We were all gifted with the ability to control what we think about. It's been my experience that it's more fun to think about what you want your world to look like. Positive feedback is the breakfast of champions! Look for the unique qualities that make us what we were intended to be - in yourself and in others.
I once saw a poster that showed a picture of a little child with the caption, "God didn't make no junk!" It was very simply and profoundly stated. Keep that in mind when times get a bit challenging. We're all made of strong, resilient stuff and we can get through it!
Peace,
Gordon Graham
Change Agent
Saturday, July 25, 2009
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
The First Webinar by Instar Performance was a success!
On July 9, Instar Performance conducted our first Webinar: Managing Change in Challenging Times. It was a new experience for me. I'm used to a live audience with the ability to read body language and adjust the presentation accordingly. However, that said, I was very pleased to connect with people across the country without the airports, planes and hotels! I still do live presentations, but this increases our ability to reach more people and stay in touch.
A friend of ours, who works with men and women dealing with drug and alcohol issues, used the opportunity to put me on speaker phone, allowing his group to participate as well. What a nice resource for someone working to make a difference in people's lives.
Instar will be hosting a Webinar every couple of weeks, so if you know individuals or groups who might benefit, let us know. Email us at info@instarperformance.com. The next Webinar will be on Self-Talk, that constant stream of conversation going on in our minds at all times and its power to move us toward or away from our goals and desires. This key concept also allows us to understand how to increase our circle of influence.
Take care and let Instar know how we can assist you in your efforts to improve our families and our communities.
Warm personal regards,
Gordon Graham
Change Agent
Instar Performance
A friend of ours, who works with men and women dealing with drug and alcohol issues, used the opportunity to put me on speaker phone, allowing his group to participate as well. What a nice resource for someone working to make a difference in people's lives.
Instar will be hosting a Webinar every couple of weeks, so if you know individuals or groups who might benefit, let us know. Email us at info@instarperformance.com. The next Webinar will be on Self-Talk, that constant stream of conversation going on in our minds at all times and its power to move us toward or away from our goals and desires. This key concept also allows us to understand how to increase our circle of influence.
Take care and let Instar know how we can assist you in your efforts to improve our families and our communities.
Warm personal regards,
Gordon Graham
Change Agent
Instar Performance
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
Accountability
For half my life, I placed the blame for my failures outside my own control. I didn't realize the impact that our thinking patterns have on our behavior. I didn't know that if you change the way you think, you change the way you act. Not just on Sundays, but every day! This was a profound truth for me.
Discovering this truth was a significant emotional event in my life and caused me to have an epiphany - that I have the power to change my life. This was the single most empowering realization of my life, and was the catalyst for turning my life totally around. I had a vision of how I could make a difference in the world, and I never looked back after that day.
The whole idea of the impact of comfort zones was illuminating. I realized that prison had become a comfort zone for me. I felt God had left a component out of me, that I didn't fit in outside prison walls. While there are some people in prison from affluent neighborhoods, they really are the exception. The majority of men and women who fill our prisons come from environments that have few opportunities, where drugs are part of the culture; there are many single parents and a high rate of poverty.
Prison is a part of the expectation for young people in these environments. There are few, if any, decent-paying jobs and they feel locked out of the American dream. Dealing drugs and stealing become part of the culture; even an aspiration. A lot of young people succeed despite the culture, but when there's nothing to lose, there's not much at risk if they get busted. When they come out of prison back into the same old, same old, it's easy to fall back into the same old haunts, same old friends and the next thing they know, they're on the chain car back to SingSing. Some escape the life, and many give back to society and work to make a difference. That's the good news.
Unfortunately, the general public is fed the bad news. Only the heinous crimes get front page. These visuals play over and over in people's living rooms from New York to Seattle. It gradually creates an illusion that everyone locked up is a public safety threat. There are tons of men and women doing good things, but they never, or rarely, make the news.
I recently visited our women's prison in Washington. The cost to the taxpayer is $42,000 per year per inmate. The prison is a better environment than many of these women have on the streets. If we invested half of that amount of money on assistance, childcare, etc., most of those women would never be in prison, or could make it on the outside. Only a small percentage of these women are an actual public safety threat.
Our approach to public safety needs a major overhaul, however when we are talking about threatening people's jobs, change becomes a challenging endeavor.
We have created a system where success is built on failure, a system where the product is people. What a paradox. Maybe someday... We can only hope.
Peace,
Gordon Graham
Change Agent
Discovering this truth was a significant emotional event in my life and caused me to have an epiphany - that I have the power to change my life. This was the single most empowering realization of my life, and was the catalyst for turning my life totally around. I had a vision of how I could make a difference in the world, and I never looked back after that day.
The whole idea of the impact of comfort zones was illuminating. I realized that prison had become a comfort zone for me. I felt God had left a component out of me, that I didn't fit in outside prison walls. While there are some people in prison from affluent neighborhoods, they really are the exception. The majority of men and women who fill our prisons come from environments that have few opportunities, where drugs are part of the culture; there are many single parents and a high rate of poverty.
Prison is a part of the expectation for young people in these environments. There are few, if any, decent-paying jobs and they feel locked out of the American dream. Dealing drugs and stealing become part of the culture; even an aspiration. A lot of young people succeed despite the culture, but when there's nothing to lose, there's not much at risk if they get busted. When they come out of prison back into the same old, same old, it's easy to fall back into the same old haunts, same old friends and the next thing they know, they're on the chain car back to SingSing. Some escape the life, and many give back to society and work to make a difference. That's the good news.
Unfortunately, the general public is fed the bad news. Only the heinous crimes get front page. These visuals play over and over in people's living rooms from New York to Seattle. It gradually creates an illusion that everyone locked up is a public safety threat. There are tons of men and women doing good things, but they never, or rarely, make the news.
I recently visited our women's prison in Washington. The cost to the taxpayer is $42,000 per year per inmate. The prison is a better environment than many of these women have on the streets. If we invested half of that amount of money on assistance, childcare, etc., most of those women would never be in prison, or could make it on the outside. Only a small percentage of these women are an actual public safety threat.
Our approach to public safety needs a major overhaul, however when we are talking about threatening people's jobs, change becomes a challenging endeavor.
We have created a system where success is built on failure, a system where the product is people. What a paradox. Maybe someday... We can only hope.
Peace,
Gordon Graham
Change Agent
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Technology
As I've traveled across the country, talking with people from many sectors of society, the common theme is change. How do we equip ourselves and the people we work with to respond to the myriad of changes taking place in our world? The reality of a global economy and the speed of technological innovations can be overwhelming, especially to older generations. The challenges and transistions we all face are greater than ever before in our history.
These changes have created amazing communication tools with the ability to contact hundreds of people with one transmission from your chair. For some, these changes are positive things that make their life easier and more fulfilling. For others, life gets more complicated. From a business standpoint, it is extremely valuable to have instant access to business associates and clients around the world. The ability to set schedules and include others in business meetings and decision-making improves engagement of co-workers and collaborators. There is much to be said for the positive features of technology.
The downside inherent in email, faxes and text messages is that we lose the intimacy of a handshake, and the ability to read non-verbal communication. I'm a fan of technology and what it can do to unite and inspire people; having said that, I still treasure the intimacy of human-to-human contact. I'm talking about a hug, a handshake or a fist-bump with a cantankerous union leader or a reserved plant manager. That makes my day! It exemplifies for me that we all want the same thing - to be acknowledged, respected and involved. My goal in life is to connect the disconnected and improve the planet we all share.
Peace,
Gordon Graham
Change Agent
These changes have created amazing communication tools with the ability to contact hundreds of people with one transmission from your chair. For some, these changes are positive things that make their life easier and more fulfilling. For others, life gets more complicated. From a business standpoint, it is extremely valuable to have instant access to business associates and clients around the world. The ability to set schedules and include others in business meetings and decision-making improves engagement of co-workers and collaborators. There is much to be said for the positive features of technology.
The downside inherent in email, faxes and text messages is that we lose the intimacy of a handshake, and the ability to read non-verbal communication. I'm a fan of technology and what it can do to unite and inspire people; having said that, I still treasure the intimacy of human-to-human contact. I'm talking about a hug, a handshake or a fist-bump with a cantankerous union leader or a reserved plant manager. That makes my day! It exemplifies for me that we all want the same thing - to be acknowledged, respected and involved. My goal in life is to connect the disconnected and improve the planet we all share.
Peace,
Gordon Graham
Change Agent
Monday, June 15, 2009
Gordon Graham on STAYING FOCUSED
Gordon Graham on STAYING FOCUSED
This is an interesting time for people in every sector of our society. It’s a time that challenges our ability to maintain our focus on what is truly important in our lives.
The bankruptcy of General Motors was a heart-wrenching event for yours truly. I’ve had a relationship with GM and the U.A.W. for thirty-odd years. Many of my close friends work for GM. They range from regional directors to plant managers, from union leaders to men and women on the production line. The impact that just one plant closure can have on the economy of a community is devastating. Many of the General Motors plants are the largest employers in small and mid-sized cities. The tax revenue provides the resources for education, social services and many other community needs. When a plant closes so do many small businesses that depend upon the work force as their customer base.
Change is a constant in today’s rapidly evolving world. My hope is that our leadership will recognize the importance of keeping decent jobs in our communities. We all recognize that the world keeps getting smaller with the increase of technology and the emerging global economy. The free trade system as it has played out has not been a fair trade system for America’s workers, and our current health care system alone puts us at a tremendous disadvantage.
Leadership needs to understand that the men and women who build our cars and trucks don’t need an edge, they just need a chance to compete on a level playing field.
Peace,
Gordon Graham, Change Agent
www.ggco.com
This is an interesting time for people in every sector of our society. It’s a time that challenges our ability to maintain our focus on what is truly important in our lives.
The bankruptcy of General Motors was a heart-wrenching event for yours truly. I’ve had a relationship with GM and the U.A.W. for thirty-odd years. Many of my close friends work for GM. They range from regional directors to plant managers, from union leaders to men and women on the production line. The impact that just one plant closure can have on the economy of a community is devastating. Many of the General Motors plants are the largest employers in small and mid-sized cities. The tax revenue provides the resources for education, social services and many other community needs. When a plant closes so do many small businesses that depend upon the work force as their customer base.
Change is a constant in today’s rapidly evolving world. My hope is that our leadership will recognize the importance of keeping decent jobs in our communities. We all recognize that the world keeps getting smaller with the increase of technology and the emerging global economy. The free trade system as it has played out has not been a fair trade system for America’s workers, and our current health care system alone puts us at a tremendous disadvantage.
Leadership needs to understand that the men and women who build our cars and trucks don’t need an edge, they just need a chance to compete on a level playing field.
Peace,
Gordon Graham, Change Agent
www.ggco.com
Friday, June 12, 2009
Fair Trade
Change is a constant in our lives, and as the speed of change increases, it becomes more challenging to stay ahead of the curve. The days of lifetime employment seem to be a thing of the past. Flexibility, creativity and entrepreneurship are required to stay in the game.
Since the early 70's, it has been apparent that smaller, more fuel-efficient vehicles were the future of the automobile industry. The bankruptcy of General Motors is the result of leadership without vision. However, it's the men and women who work in the plants who suffer most. The workforce in the U.S. is comparable to any in the world, but they compete on an unfair playing field. We need a change in how we establish guidelines in a global economy. To produce a product off-shore at $2.00 an hour, and then bring it back to the U.S. and compete against products made here is unfair. The cost of health care alone makes us unable to compete against a country that provides its citizens with universal health care.
At Instar Performance, our curriculum has been a resource to assist individuals, organizations and communities in taking a pro-active approach to the changes we're all experiencing. The ability to anticipate the impact of a global economy on the marketplace helps us better prepare for a new reality. When the economy suffers, the purchasing power of the consumer is impacted; this in turn as an effect on the tax dollars collected, which ultimately has a huge ripple-effect on people's lives. It's always our most important services that suffer, i.e. education, health care, and the most vulnerable members of society. We seem to lack the foresight to anticipate the impact that change has on our economy.
Having been a boxer in my early years, it would be like asking me to fight with one hand tied behind my back! There's no "free trade" if it isn't "fair trade." How many more major backruptcies will it take to come to an agreement that levels the playing field for our workers? My empathy is with the workers on the plant floor whose jobs are at risk because of decisions being made in corporate boardrooms, far from the production lines.
Peace,
Gordon Graham
Change Agent
Since the early 70's, it has been apparent that smaller, more fuel-efficient vehicles were the future of the automobile industry. The bankruptcy of General Motors is the result of leadership without vision. However, it's the men and women who work in the plants who suffer most. The workforce in the U.S. is comparable to any in the world, but they compete on an unfair playing field. We need a change in how we establish guidelines in a global economy. To produce a product off-shore at $2.00 an hour, and then bring it back to the U.S. and compete against products made here is unfair. The cost of health care alone makes us unable to compete against a country that provides its citizens with universal health care.
At Instar Performance, our curriculum has been a resource to assist individuals, organizations and communities in taking a pro-active approach to the changes we're all experiencing. The ability to anticipate the impact of a global economy on the marketplace helps us better prepare for a new reality. When the economy suffers, the purchasing power of the consumer is impacted; this in turn as an effect on the tax dollars collected, which ultimately has a huge ripple-effect on people's lives. It's always our most important services that suffer, i.e. education, health care, and the most vulnerable members of society. We seem to lack the foresight to anticipate the impact that change has on our economy.
Having been a boxer in my early years, it would be like asking me to fight with one hand tied behind my back! There's no "free trade" if it isn't "fair trade." How many more major backruptcies will it take to come to an agreement that levels the playing field for our workers? My empathy is with the workers on the plant floor whose jobs are at risk because of decisions being made in corporate boardrooms, far from the production lines.
Peace,
Gordon Graham
Change Agent
Monday, April 27, 2009
Gordon Graham on "In the Game!"
Gordon Graham: In the Game!
As the transition from Gordon Graham & Co. to Instar Performance evolves, I want you to know that G.G. is still in the game. I’m healthy and involved in assisting individuals and organizations to improve relationships and managing changes that contribute to a better world.
Next week Cat and I will be at a Ford Motor plant in Kansas City. We’re working with a management team that’s intent on keeping jobs in their community. It’s critical that we maximize our skills and abilities to be the best that we can be in this global economy. The strategies that were once considered “soft skills” are now understood to be a critical component in keeping jobs in our plants. It’s the collective habits, attitudes, beliefs and expectations of the work force that make us competitive. It’s the ability to engage the hearts and minds of individuals on the line that will help keep jobs in our communities. A non-threatening learning experience creates the awareness that each of us plays a vital part in this goal.
It’s important that when we ask people to change we offer new tools. Each of us needs to see the W.I.I.F.M. (what’s in it for me?). We all work for our own reasons; perhaps it’s building a better life for our families, vacation property, a new car, keeping jobs in the plant, etc. It could also be as basic as “just” making a positive difference in the world. Every day brings new opportunities, so stay in the game!
Be at peace,
Gordon Graham
www.ggco.com
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